Learning To Slow Down

Growing up in suburban Texas, everything was always a competition.  When you’re a fish in the sea of almost 4,000 high school students, your entire world is dedicated to making a name for yourself, being special, or being worth other’s time and attention.  Whether it was academics, after-school clubs, or being a member of the marching band, my value seemed to be contingent on success.  Although I was incredibly passionate about music and performance, the high expectations and standards I was surrounded by were often draining.

Because of this constant pressure, when it came time to choose a college, I decided to make a choice that definitely turned some heads, the University of Hawaii. Admittedly, it is slightly terrifying to move to an island I had only visited once at eight years old, but I was ready to experience a new place, culture, and way of life. Finding my footing was a little bit tricky at first, and I was eager to find my own little corner, a place to be accepted and to belong.  

So, on one of my first days on campus, my roommate and I made our way to the courtyard for the freshman club fair.  Among the noise and chaos was the University of Hawaii Ballroom Club’s small table.  They may not have had free stress balls or promises of a shiny new opportunity for my resume, but even from afar, I could tell they had a passion and genuine love for their club. Somehow, some way, I found myself making my way to Studio 2 the next week for the first practice of the semester.  I was not really sure what to expect, but excited, nonetheless.

From the get-go, ballroom dancing was unlike any activity I’d ever participated in. It was certainly a little strange at first to dance with people I’d never met before, but this unfamiliarity was quickly overcome by the kindness of the teachers and more experienced members.  There was no expectation to be perfect; it was just a room full of people coming together to dance. There were plenty of toes stepped on, traffic jams, and missteps, but no one was judging – we were all just learning together.

In October, Ravi Narayan and Synthia Sumukti, our instructors, announced the December holiday performance, inviting all of us, even the beginners, to perform.  I was a little nervous about signing up, but my new friends, Courtney and Lyndsey, were also new to ballroom, and so together, we took a leap of faith and put our names down on the paper.  

Learning the choreography could have been difficult, but my dance partner, Luis, and the many kind followers were incredibly patient and generous with their time, answering my many questions.  Each week, I gained confidence and just really began to have fun!  Dance practice was a moment in time when the stresses of work and school fell away.  I felt free in a way I hadn’t in a very long time.

Before I knew it, it was the big day I’d been looking forward to all semester — the winter performance at the Ala Wai Golf Course on December 21!  My lovely roommate and another sweet friend helped me with my makeup and hair, and we made our way to the dance floor.  Of course, it wouldn’t be dance without a couple of hiccups.  I got off a stop too early from the bus, my shoe clasp broke, and I began to get a little bit nervous.  But as soon as we walked on the floor, all of that stress fell away.  All that mattered was that I had a good time performing the dances I’d worked on all semester.  When we bowed at the end, I felt proud of myself not for being the best dancer but for surrounding myself with a group of positive, encouraging people as I tried something new.

College is certainly a formative time for everyone, filled with tons of change and uncertainty.  Ballroom dancing has shown me that it’s okay to try something new just for fun, and that there is so much more to life than competition, stress, and comparison.  I am incredibly grateful to my teachers and fellow dancers for helping me to find my spark again, and I know that anyone who stops by for a class, whether it be for a week or a year, will find a little world that accepts them with open arms.